I think that one of the most undervalued tools in communication is empathy. Empathy is the ability to identify and understand someone else’s feelings – what it’s like to walk a mile in their shoes. While one can complete many of the day to day tasks of their job without empathy, I argue that regularly exercising empathy provides you with the ability to communicate better, close negotiations (sales) faster, and manage consensus among teams easier. The ability to empathize is directly related to your ability and effectiveness at influencing outcomes.

While it’s helpful if you’ve been born with a natural inclination for empathy, it can be learned. It is a muscle that can be strengthened through practice.

Here are a few ideas for practicing your empathy skills:

— Look upon every human – the barista at the coffee shop, the cashier at the checkout, a favorite author, an employee, your child, etc. – as a teacher that you can learn something from.

— If you choose, your daily routine can be a graduate school where you can continue to learn through the wealth of interesting people available to you.
Approach the world with an inquisitive mind – without judgment or manipulation of position. Show sincere interest in what people have to say. Be present in thought and mind.

— At the end of each day, write down one thing that you’ve learned from your “teachers”.

— And, most importantly, apply what you’ve learned. What’s the point of understanding others better if you don’t actually use what you’ve learned.